Do you ever think it might be easier..if not for just one second, that it would be easier to give up than keep going on. Do you ever think that things will get better, only to find out that they don't. Do you ever think that the grass is always greener, only to find it is covered in shit!
Im tired of thinking, tired of the anger always building up inside of me....tired of having a great moment and feeling like this is where it all changes only to feel the same 2 minutes later. Im 35, and by now I should have my act together, I should be the great mom, the go-to boss at work, the friend I used to be with so many people, the person who once had a sense of humor..to the point I would literally pee myself from laughing so hard. Wht happened to this person. I want to be that person again. This is all so fucked...I feel completely hopeless right now. I know Im not the only one out there like this.
I have only been married for less than 2 months and already i feel like I need to have an affair - to fullfill the loss I have encountered since we married. Where is the love, the effection, the laughter. Somebody tell me...I will do whatever it takes to get it back. Fuck I hate my life right now!
Sunday, October 5, 2008
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